I'm not sure what to do ..
One part of me thinks that we belong together because we pretty much understand each other. But the other part of me thinks that we are making each other worse people .. like we're fueling each other into destruction.
Like it makes me mad because I watch things or see other people together and I wonder why you don't treat me like that. I'm becoming so angry at you. I'm angry well hurt for all that you did, but now I'm becoming mad because your still being the person that you were/are. It doesn't feel like it's enough. And am I going to constantly say it's not enough?? Cause that's not fair. Just tired of feeling like I'm walked all over. That I can't do anything right. Well unless it's like cooking cause you do suck at that.
And I am torn. The one part of me goes you love him you want to be with him for the rest of your life. Plus too I took vows which are very important to me. I stood before my faith and God and promised to be there thru thick and thin. Then the other part of me is going I need to leave. I'm not getting any younger and if I would wait too long I'll be alone. I know that's not fair to say, it probably stings to see, I would be sad to hear if you would think like that. Idk
Right now, I'm waiting for that storm. It's coming .. I can feel it. It's been awhile, so it's close. And I don't know what will happen this time :(
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